2/19/96

Mike is back from Florida.   Everyone else is at work or school.   Started reading Thoreau’s FAITH IN A SEED.   Fell asleep in the sunny atelier.

           This day was a lonely day.   I wasn’t scheduled for work at any job until night.   I went to the house at 35 Reid Avenue to see if any of the children were around and visit with them.   (Scheduled visitation rights after a divorce never seem to be enough.   I feel like an outsider to my own children.)   Everyone seemed to be working or busy and, hence, not at home.   My brother (Mike) had just stopped by for a break in his travels from his theatre work after a vacation in Florida.   Even he wasn’t in the mood for a visit.   He wanted to get home and relax.   I took up my book and sat in the winter sunshine inside the large upstairs window.   Like a contented cat I fell asleep.   Unlike the cat I was not contented, merely exhausted, emotionally and physically.

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